If you have missed out on the past year, I did a side blog for our daughter, Eva. You can click on the link to read from where we left off (February 2017) https://evaeverafter.blogspot.com/
Life with three kids has been very....time consuming! Dexter struggles with nursing so I am pumping and bottle feeding. It seems when I am attached to the pump my rambunctious 3 year old decides to reek havoc!
But anyways, lets start with this birth story!
It started on Monday the 26th, I had a doctors appointment and was very emotional. I wanted to be done being pregnant. I had so much anxiety on the daily basis it was pushing me over my mental ability to even function. TJ was off that week and took me in because he was so worried. My doctor checked me and I was at a one and then sent us on our merry way. That night I took some sleep aid and got some rest, I really needed it.
Tuesday rolls around and TJ is working nights so he is sleeping while I take Marley to school. I felt so much better today! I am able to breath and a tad bit more comfortable. I call TJ on my way home and while I am driving I have some back 'spasms' that come and go. TJ says its probably early early labor while I chalk it up as braxton hicks. He heads off to work and I took the kids on a walk when we got home. (it was even 40+ outside so I switched into some shorts that I had been wanting to wear at least once before I was no longer pregnant ;) )
Later that evening I was on the phone with my mom and I told her I kept having some contractions but it was most likely braxton hicks, I could have been dehydrated since I hadn't had much to drink that day. I put the kids to bed and decided to clean up a bit. I was really tired but I just had to get some cleaning done.
Around 10, I texted my friend Teri and told her what was going on. She told me to get some rest but have some bags packed for the kids just in case. I took a shower and decided to go lay down. No sense of timing these 'contractions' because I knew they were just braxton hicks.
I woke up at 2 with a leg cramp and then noticed that these braxton hicks were starting to really become intense. At this point I started to 'think' I was in early labor. I hopped into the bath and called TJ. We discussed that this was just early labor and he would be home around 9, we would drive the 2 hours to the hospital and have our baby that day. I called the Labor and Delivery wing, I told the nurse(who will remain nameless) that I was having contractions 4 minutes apart lasting for a minute each. I had a two hour drive, felt pressure in my rectum and needed to know if I should head in. She told me to lay on my left side and take some Tylenol and if I were in *real* labor I wouldn't be able to talk.
I decided to try and relax. I knew this was just super early labor and didn't want to wear myself out with counting the contractions. But they kept getting stronger and I was no longer comfortable in the tub. I hopped out and called my mom and we talked for a few. I told her that I was in early stages of labor and she might miss her photo op with her Jazz player. ;) While on the phone the contractions kept getting more intense and it came to the point of I could not talk during them. They became closer together and didn't seem to have much of a break in between. We hung up so she could get heading out.
My next call was to Teri. "I don't think I am making it to Dickinson." Teri, the EMT went into emergency mode and I am not sure what all our conversation entailed but these contractions were really coming and on top of each other! I tried walking around, laying on my bed, leaning, but I only felt comfortable on the toilet. They were so intense I started pushing but couldn't stop! She immediately told me "You hang up right now and call 911" I tried declining but she was persistent that I call 911 right now and she was on her way.
I had a mental debate on if I should actually call 911 (my stubborn side was telling me I could just drive over and save a few bucks from calling 911). It was so hard to dial! The operator answered and I just said "I think I am in labor". Not hey, I am having these intense contractions back to back, I am pushing, or anything. Just "I think I am in labor" I knew I was in labor! haha!
Not even a minute in I started grunting and doing the low growl and I just couldn't stop pushing! I caught a break to give her some information since I was unable to talk during the contractions. Then another wave hit me. This time I couldn't stop pushing and then POP! My water broke. Not only broke but exploded (TMI I know but come on, its a birth story)! I told the operator that my water broke and looked in the toilet to make sure there was no baby plopped in (I've seen too many "I didn't know I was pregnant" episodes that ended up with a baby in the toilet ;) ) but instead there was lots of blood. The operator informed me that an ambulance was on the way and the police had been reaching my husband.
-Okay, lets break for a minute. I might add that TJ was on a location that was 2 HOURS away and he had NO way of getting off location until 7 am. So he was pretty much stuck there.--
After my water broke I felt SO much better. The contractions stopped and I felt no more 'pain' but just pressure every few minutes. No joke, I almost told the operator "never-mind, I feel better now, I will just drive myself" But I knew Teri would beat me if I 'canceled' that ambulance ;) Plus, I am unsure if they can even do that....cancel your emergency. (I know how ridiculous I sound--haha!)
I didn't want to get blood all over my carpets so I threw on a pair of Depends I had stashed away for afterbirth care and got my kids up. This was around 4 am so it was a bit of a challenge to get them to wake up and figure out what I was to do. The operator stayed on the phone with me (protocol, I guess ;) ) and I realized when they were almost to my door that I had nothing on! I was glad to have a nightgown near by because I had no idea if I could put pants on, that pressure was surreal!
Ambulance came, I did the walk to the stretcher and we all hopped into the rig and headed towards the hospital.
By the time we got there and got into a room, moved into another room, Teri had walked in. The nurse was trying to get the monitors on.
She couldn't find a heartbeat. My heart sank. No, I could not do this again. She went to grab a portable ultrasound but wasn't finding much. I just wanted to hear that sweet sound of a heartbeat but she wasn't saying much when I kept asking. I looked to Teri for any sign of it being okay but I was already in panic mode. "How was I going to tell TJ?" "My kids are sitting right here, this cant be happening"
After what seemed like forever, we heard the sweetest sound and a huge sigh of relief!
Then, again, after some more time, the nurse checked me (we had to make sure my placenta wasn't down, and was hesitant since I was bleeding). I was waiting for her to say how dilated I was but instead left the room again.
Ugh! So frustrating not knowing ANYTHING really about what was going on. I asked Teri what she thought was up and she said that her guess was the nurse was going to come back in and, worse case, they would prep me for a c-section.
Boy was she right! They came back in and started prepping me for an emergency c-section.
All while, my kids are just sitting on the couch and as I am preparing to go into a c-section, I had no clue what to do with my kids. The nurses couldn't sit with them since there was another delivery right next door, and I didn't want to go into this c-section alone.
We started calling people (at 6am) to see if anybody could come sit with them--this was a crazy story within itself! But we finally got someone to come pick them up and take them for the day. And we were getting ready to go back into surgery.
I was sad TJ was going to miss the birth of our son but at the same time I wanted him to be safe. This was not the plan, but whatever got him here safely I just didn't care anymore. I wanted a happy ending to this story.
Okay, operating room; they cut me open but something is taking longer than anticipated. They just kept reminding me to not breath moving my belly (which is really hard to not do when you are told to not do it...so it took lots of focusing for me to not do that, haha!
7:38 am Dexter Daniel Carney came out weighing 8 pounds 6 ounces and 20 and a quarter inches long. And three weeks early! It was so wonderful to have him out and hearing him cry. Oh, how I have waited so long to have this.
Now, here is the crazy part of the story and it will get into some details (again, its a birth story--if you don't want details you probably just want to skip this).
When the nurse checked me: What she DIDN'T say was "Hey, you are dilated at a 6 and by the way, your baby's leg is out." He was footling breach. He had flipped and they couldn't try to flip him back because A. my water had already broke, and B. His foot was out.
In the OR: What they didn't say was "We are having to push his leg back into your body so we can pull him out." I just remember them saying "hey, you can never attempt to have a VBAC if you have any more children, it can kill you and the baby. Reason being? They couldn't get him out doing a regular cut but had to cut up into my uterus to pull him out foot first. They told me they called it a flamingo because of how they are positioned.
So, there you have it. Our crazy, ridiculous, emotional birth story. I guess Dexter needed a super dramatic entrance into this world. He has been so worth it though and I am so glad to be his mom and have this crazy, dramatic story to retell! :)
<3 Our little Flamingo :) <3
This is our little Eva Lamb, we wanted to add her into Dexter's newborns. She sure is loved and missed dearly. I know she played a big part into bringing Dexter here safely into my our arms.
We love you forever Eva Carolyn and look forward to holding you again someday. Thank you for sending us a little piece of you through Dexter. <3
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