It is nice to have someone to come home to at night, and to think its been nine months already (it feels like a snap of a finger), I just get so much more excited for the eternity ahead of us! And even more exciting, it was just like yesterday that we found news we were expecting Baby Carney and here we are almost 6 months along...only a little while longer until we get to meet our precious baby!
After we had decided to switch from a doctor to a midwife, we had become far along in the stage of pregnancy for the half way check-just to see if the baby was developing normally and find out the sex if desired. Well, our baby is growing just perfect and healthy in every way! At first we were deciding what we wanted to know as far as the sex went; did we want to find out right away or be surprised? HAHA that is funny...I couldn't wait any longer I NEEDED to know that we were for sure having a boy; stop the anticipation and guessing once and for all...We knew we were having a boy. So, we were looking up cute ideas to announce what we were having and it came down to: do we both get surprised AFTER the ultrasound with friends and family or do we both just find out at the ultrasound? Now, this is--or was--a big deal for me, I wanted to be surprised and surprise TJ (since he likes surprising me and I hate it...it was time to taste his own medicine ;) ). It was decided TJ was going to close his eyes during that portion of the ultrasound and I was going to find out the sex of the baby but reveal it later in some cool way. It honestly was the best idea, I loved seeing TJ clueless and I knew something so important. He looked at me and he said he already knew it was a boy so it was okay to hold it in...there was no surprise. I had everything planned out for the night of and with great help it was a success! Boy, oh boy, we were BOTH shocked!
My reaction: When the ultrasound technician told TJ to close his eyes I was getting all giddy inside I couldn't wait to know for sure we were having a little boy...she said it would be pretty obvious if we happened to go over that area and if TJ had his eyes open- so I thought the surprise was ruined for sure because we kept seeing something that looked like a boy part, so I was just a little low that my surprise didn't work out. But, our technician was very good at keeping that part a secret (I'm surprised on how they know where to look to get the information that they need!) When it came time we were both looking at the screen and I honestly had no idea what I was looking for. She finally typed on the screen "XX" and it took me a minute to start rethinking back to biology what those letters meant. (My brain was a little too excited and nervous to think straight so she typed it in 'english') "Its a girl"....wait-there must be a mistake, I looked at her twice and my eyes said 'did you double check?' all she could do was smile and kind of giggle a little.
We were having a little Girl! I was so excited I began to cry a little, but I wanted to conceal my face for when TJ looked back up that my face held the perfect secret. Man that was a rough day...I dropped TJ off and was just so excited I HAD to tell someone. So I called up my partner in crime-watching-videos and told her the news! She was so excited for me and we had a nice visit (she was at the store with her three kids and...I give her props, she is an amazing mom and does so well dealing with all of that!) So I was at work and just waiting for time to pass so I could pick up TJ from work, Tana was in on the secret and was helping me make the surprise happen (she did such a great job!).
I picked up TJ and we went to dinner, he was getting so ansi! It was killing him but I was enjoying the surprise....and then soon it was time to reveal the big surprise!
So there you have it, we were both in shock to find out we were having a girl, we were for sure it was a boy and the fact that it wasn't was a little disappointing, but we couldn't be happier to have a little girl!
In my last blog, I talked a little about how I was not attached to the baby inside of me and I heard it was normal. I decided to wait until I could feel some kicking and then decide if I loved it or not. Well, the kicking came and I was....unsure...I didn't know if I loved the baby or not, did this mean I was going to be a bad mom? No, it meant I was doing everything right; everyone has those doubts and if you don't feel a connection when you get kicked it just means it takes a little loner (I have done my research on this because it was my main fear that I was not going to truly love this child). Now to answer the question: Do I love my little girl? The answer is, of course! It is such an amazing feeling (and weird) when she kicks me. Today I was relaxing and I felt her kick and I looked down, I could see my belly moving when she kicked me and I could see her stretching as well! (such a life changing experience) All I could do was smile and try to get her to move some more for me.
My favorites have been when TJ talks to her and can feel her move and kick (though it is faint he can still feel her) I had him lay down on my stomach the other day and he got to feel her kick him in the head- which was way cool for both of us!-
I am so excited to be a mother because I have such a loving and caring husband that gets to be a daddy; knowing how great he is and will be, makes me that much more excited for our little girl to get here! He takes great care of both of us (spoils our little princess more than he should ;) ) and it makes it that much easier to prepare more for her arrival!
